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Dec. 6th, 2006 12:14 amAunt Isobel usually sends Christmas cards fairly early. It strikes me that I will be getting a card from a dead person.
I wonder how it will be.
It's odd - most of the people in my family die at or around Christmastime. My gran was January seventh, my grandfather was New Year's Eve.
I still have the last Christmas card with 'Grandad' written on it. That is something I will never, ever throw away, along with the little gold card my grandmother wrote to me after his funeral, to tell me how proud he'd been of me. In it, she praised my eloquence.
Words fail me when I lose people, though. It's just starting to hit me. It makes me want to fly to Scotland and a bit back in time so I can see her again. I said I wouldn't be sad. It's not like I even saw her that often - she was mostly Christmas cards and photographs. How stupid is it to be crying over someone I've seen twice in my memory?
I am so glad my parents moved to Canada. I love it here. But so many people get to have their extended family close. They get to mourn without feeling ridiculous. And I was totally doing fine up until right now.
I wonder how it will be.
It's odd - most of the people in my family die at or around Christmastime. My gran was January seventh, my grandfather was New Year's Eve.
I still have the last Christmas card with 'Grandad' written on it. That is something I will never, ever throw away, along with the little gold card my grandmother wrote to me after his funeral, to tell me how proud he'd been of me. In it, she praised my eloquence.
Words fail me when I lose people, though. It's just starting to hit me. It makes me want to fly to Scotland and a bit back in time so I can see her again. I said I wouldn't be sad. It's not like I even saw her that often - she was mostly Christmas cards and photographs. How stupid is it to be crying over someone I've seen twice in my memory?
I am so glad my parents moved to Canada. I love it here. But so many people get to have their extended family close. They get to mourn without feeling ridiculous. And I was totally doing fine up until right now.
